The Confidence Loop: Why Action Builds Belief
I hate it when I’m told, “Be more confident.” It sounds simple, but no one ever tells us what that actually means - or how to get there.
It’s easy to believe confidence is something you either have or don’t. A trait some people are born with, while the rest of us wait for it to show up.
But confidence doesn’t come from thinking. It comes from doing. And more often than not, it arrives after the action, not before it.
The Confidence Myth
The idea that you need to feel confident before you speak up or take the lead is one of the biggest mindset traps in the workplace.
In reality, it usually happens the other way around: you speak up first. Your voice shakes a little. But then, you realise you made it through.
That’s where real confidence begins.
What is the Confidence Loop?
The confidence loop is the idea that confidence isn't a starting point. It's something that builds with action. It's not about waiting to feel ready; it's about proving to yourself, bit by bit, that you can handle more than you think.
It’s a simple cycle:
You take a small action.
You survive it (or learn from it).
You gain evidence that you can do hard things.
That evidence builds belief.
That belief fuels your next step. The more steps you take, the stronger the loop becomes.
It’s momentum, not magic.
Everyday Moments That Grow Confidence
The confidence loop shows up in the small, everyday moments, the kind that feel insignificant to others, but feel big to you:
Speaking up in a meeting when you're the most junior person in the room.
Asking a question, even if it might sound obvious.
Volunteering to present when you'd rather stay quiet.
Admitting you need help, and realising afterwards that no one thinks any less of you.
These aren’t grand gestures. But each one chips away at doubt and builds trust in yourself.
What Gets in the Way
It’s not always a lack of skill or ambition that holds people back. It’s what’s happening in their head. And in fast-paced, high-pressure environments, these confidence blockers tend to show up more often:
Perfectionism: "I’ll act when I’m 100% ready." It convinces us there’s a perfect time to step up and that anything less isn’t good enough. But waiting for perfection usually means waiting forever.
Imposter Syndrome: "I don’t belong here, so I’ll stay quiet." This inner script tells us we’re the only ones who don’t have it figured out. It keeps us silent, even when we have something valuable to say.
Fear of Judgement: "What if they think I’m not smart enough?" This fear keeps us in our heads and on the sidelines. But the judgement we imagine is often louder than anything actually being said.
These stories thrive in silence. But action breaks the cycle even when it’s messy or incomplete.
How Leaders Can Support Confidence in Others
If you lead a team, you play a powerful role in helping others build self-belief:
Celebrate small, brave actions, not just perfect outcomes
Confidence builds when people feel seen for their effort, not just their wins.Normalise learning in public
Let mistakes be part of the process. When failure isn’t punished, people try again.Share your own moments of doubt
Being open about uncertainty gives others permission to be real, too.Create a culture where speaking up doesn’t come with risk
Make it clear, through your words and reactions, that contributions are welcome, not judged.
Confidence is contagious. But someone has to go first.
A Closing Thought
Trying something new, especially when you’re unsure, anxious, or afraid, can feel like standing on the edge of something much bigger than it is. The fear is real. The hesitation makes sense.
You might not feel ready. Most people don’t.
But confidence doesn’t wait for fear to disappear. It builds as you move through it.
So if you’re second-guessing yourself, know this: you’re not alone. And you don’t have to be fearless to begin.
Start small. Go gently. Let it be a little messy.
You don’t need to feel confident today. You just need to take one step, your future self will thank you for.
